MELTdown!
There you are. The mom. All calm-like. Then BAM. MeLTdown!
Why in the world does this happen so quickly? Where does it start? You can wake up in the morning and everything is going well, until you see that the garbage which was SUPPOSED TO BE EMPTIED LAST NIGHT, has seeped out of it's bag, all over the cupboard floor. You look a little closer, and now you see that the onions under there SOMEONE WAS ASKED TO put in a dry spot, are now smelling like they need more help than Dr. Phil can give. On top of that, the seepage has gone down through the cupboard into a sloppy mess on the floor which you just washed (and now you have stepped in it). And there you are. In a full scale MelTDOwn. You reach 0 - 60, in 2.5 seconds flat.
Sometimes, you can sense a MEltDOWNN coming and try to head it off at the pass. Certain things have been building inside - things like seeing gobs of used toothpaste on the sink, or going to take a bath and all you can feel is scum. You want to keep it in check. So you try to find something to help you remain controlled. A good book? Can't find your glasses. A t.v. show? Husband is there already watching a show about airplanes crashing. You don't' want to crash and burn, so you turn to food. This starts slow. One scoop of Turtles Ice Cream. Just One scoop. (By scoop, I mean a using a big spoon to dig to the bottom of the carton to get all the pecans that have made their way down there) That may not bring the tranquility back to your soul. So you turn to something a little stronger. Something like the Lay's- Cheese- Potato- Chips- Disaster- Avoidance- Diet. As you do, you remember this didn't help you avoid disaster last time. It certainly isn't headed that way this time either. So you bring in the big guns. The Bridge- Mix--And -Ambrosia-Salad-Meltdown-Recovery-Method. After a while, you realize you are still on edge, and now, your stomach is upset. Clearly, this is not the way to cope.
Sometimes, if a meltdown is in full swing, there's nothing you can do, but get in your vehicle and drive. Anywhere. Really fast. Drive. Drive. Drive. While in the vehicle, you let loose all the things you wanted to say, but knew were too dangerous. If you choose this solution, take your husband with you so he can listen to you. You will rant and rave about the abuses, and neglect and the taking-for-granted, which you constantly endure, and do they just think you are there to pickupafterthemeverydaywithoutathought about whattheymight dotomakeyour lifealittle EASIER? Husbands are good for listening. And for watching for traffic, helping to avoid other disasters, while you stare straight ahead and vent. Husbands are also good for reminding you that you are now half way to New York, and may want to think about turning around at some point.
Meltdowns are never planned. And although they don't happen often, they always take the family by surprise. "What's with her?" is the question in all their minds. It helps to warn the family beforehand, in a quiet moment, that sometimes, life just gets too much, and they need to understand, moms are very human, and like the straw that breaks the proverbial back of the camel, seeping garbage, and smelly onions, are accelerants for the inability to cope with everyday events which have been ganging up for quite a while. Explain to your family that when you are having a meltdown, they must refrain from engaging in a psychological discussion about why you are in tears over the garbage. They must not give into their propensity to analyze, break down, or dissect the situation. They must accept it has happened. And whatever they do, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, ask if its your time of the month. THAT is just ASKING for Trouble (with a Capital "T"). Warn them that if they do, they will be in line to get an extra earful which will be provided by the adrenalin pumping through your system upon hearing the question..
The best thing the family can do, is give each other that look, and then begin to gather up all the garbage which has been ignored for days on end, while they were relaxing in the family room, waiting for you to serve them dinner. Then they must proceed to the hall and, collect all the sports equipment which you have been tripping over for several days. Finally, they should stop at the dryer and take the laundry out, making sure to put it away in their drawers [far away from your urge to take it all and donate it to a local charity]. Then they should look around for any other pacifying act which they could do - some suggestions would be, cleaning the kitchen, sweeping the floor, making a nice cup or Chamomile tea (known for it's calming effects) Then they should SCRAM. They need to let Dad deal with it. He's good at it. He knows how to help you through your meltdown. By the time you return from that drive (and are now down from the ledge), the kitchen will be spotless, the children will be at their desks looking studious and the tea steeped.
As you were.
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